Social Media Cards

A little bit of fun to start off the long weekend:

Chris Thilk and David Griner started to create Social Media yellow and red cards for egregious behavior on Twitter.

And to help them out, I’ve compiled an official rule book.

RED CARDS

Red cards will be issued for the following violations:

• Four or more tweets plugging one’s own blog post within a 24 hour period, including tweets from automated services like Twitterfeed.
• Use of the word “monetize” in an unironic way
• Posts mentioning surprise at the number of followers one has, provided that number is greater than 1,000
• Using a bot or interns or both to follow 1,000 or more people in the course of an evening.
• Issuing 50 or more consecutive tweets without ever once responding to an @ tweet
• Using Twitter for the sole purpose of promoting links to stories and/or posts that directly plug yourself or your company.
  
• Tweeting the UUSWVW (Using Urban Slang While Very White) violation “My Tweeps”

YELLOW CARDS

Yellow cards will be issued for the following violations:

• Greeting one’s new random followers more than once a week
• 2 or more mentions of how Plurk is much better for conversations within a 6 hour period
• The third tweet plugging one’s own blog post within a 24 hour period, including tweets from automated services like Twitterfeed.
• UUSWVW (Using Urban Slang While Very White) violations other than “My Tweeps!”
• UTSWMA (Using Teenage Slang While Middle Aged) violations, including, but not limited to, unironic uses of “prolly,” “hella,” and “BFF”
• Referring to author Seth Godin without using his last name, unless one is an actual friend of Mr. Godin’s.
• Using public @ messages to exchange information that is solely relevant to you and the recipient of said @ message.
• Three or more references to meals and/or restaurants that are not culinary masterpieces or unmitigated disasters within a one week period.
• Tweets about things best classified as “too much information” (TMI) including, but not limited to, the color of one’s body hair, the unpleasant mood of one’s spouse or significant other, the frequency or consistency of one’s bodily functions, the attractiveness of nearby strangers.